The Holly Hour

Found in Her

Now

They dragged her by the hand and out the side door before she had time to say goodbye. Holly was hit with the heat of the summer night. Wearing her bangs down was a stupid idea. They were probably plastered to her forehead in stringy sections. But the open button-down and laced bralette brought some ease to the sweltering heat wave running rapidly through the city. 

As she followed her stumbling friends, Holly thought back to the girl she left behind at the bar. The one that drew her gaze like a magnet on the dance floor. The grey hooded eyes that found her in the crowd. The short, waved hair tickled Holly’s arms when she wrapped them around her neck.  It was more intoxicating than any liquor she drank, her scent alone. She smelled like fresh linen and strawberries. Almost like the berry’s juice was painted on her blonde hair, enveloping her essence. Holly wondered if she tasted like that too. 

“Holly, grab your ID. We’re going in here.” Dana snapped her out of a tequila daydream, and they passed through the bouncer with ease. There were two levels separated by a wooden staircase. Entering the open floor by the bar, she saw more conversations, more leaning, more hopeful smiles mixed well with watered down drinks. Dana bought the next round and soon enough Holly was climbing the stairs to the upper-level dance floor. A man she passed declares she is the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. She smiled sweetly and slipped away before his hands can reach out to claim her. Two very drunk, probably underage girls teetered in awe beside her, fawning over her style and look. She was gracious but kept her feet moving towards her friends. She came to these places to disappear, not stand out. The only time she liked standing out was to her. To Piper. Never had she loved being approached more than by the summer sweet girl that looked like she tasted like berries. And it made Holly hungry to find her again. 

*

Then

Her tanned legs were long, pale ones. Freckled from the sun but still milky and smooth. They gazed up at the wooden ceiling, a wire resting between them. Each ear holding an earbud, sharing the diary lyrics of Taylor Swift. 

With Malin it was easy, like baking cookies. All the right things mixed together, the right time was set to let them grow and settle into each other. And it was all so sweet, all so delicious. They met at camp when they were 11. Holly always knew she liked girls. They were all so pretty. With their soft skin, easy laughter, the racetrack curves from top to bottom. And when she met Malin, they were fast friends. Similar music tastes, favorite movies dating back before they were born, affinity for separating M&Ms by color before eating them ravenously. 

Each summer for four weeks they shared a cabin with six other girls. They groups giggled with flashlights past curfew, they all ran screaming into the lakes with wild abandon, they braided hair and friendship bracelets. They also posed and posted Instagram pictures for kids back home to witness how beautiful the summers away made them. 

When they were 13, they practiced kissing. Some liked to have their first be with friends, some liked the taste of lip smackers, some wanted the confidence for when a boy might come along. They were all honest and maybe finding truth within those cabin walls. Holly liked kissing Malin the best. And when she told her this, sitting next to her beside the lake, Malin took her hand and agreed. 

Holly’s birthday in July transformed her at 14 and they celebrated by sneaking into the mess hall for sweets. They found ice pops in the freezer and ate them in the moonlight, sitting in the abandoned campfire ring. Holly had red cherry, and Malin had blue raspberry. When they kissed, their tongues stained purple.

The final year at camp was when they were 15. Too old to continue after that without being counselors. Knowing it was their last summer together, they made it four weeks full of firsts. Malin lived two states away. They knew it was a bittersweet goodbye, but just like the ease in the beginning, there was peace at the end. And it wasn’t tearful, heart wrenching, or dramatic like some teen romances. It was beautiful, soft, and warm. Like the stretch of sunlight on a perfect day, settling into a twilight after your whole body is warmed and ready for the dark skies to wrap a blanket around you. Holly always felt grateful to Malin for being her first, always thought about her with kindness and nostalgia. A favorite song that might stick in her mind from time to time, sweet enough to hum along.  

*

Now

A flash of short blonde made Holly whip her head to the left. But she’s too short, and didn't have those sexy long legs that had strolled towards her just an hour ago. She turned back to see Dana’s eyes roll to the back of her head. Not in ecstasy from the dancing, but rather caused from riding the strong wave of nausea splashed across her face.